Day Two: Murray’s and Blue Magic…

•June 16, 2008 • 1 Comment

The morning after PhilSo now you’ve taken your hair out for a spin, to a car show or concert, or maybe to the local watering hole in search of a lady. It’s now the morning after, you get out of the shower to find that your hair is still thoroughly encased in Murray’s. How now, brown cow?

Depending on how much you put in your hair yesterday, you might be able to get by with just repeating the last few steps from day 1. Just put the hot, wet rag on your head, remove, then style.

If you were a little more conservative with the Murray’s yesterday, you’ll find that your hair stays in place, but lacks that je ne sais quoi to be truly pompalicious. No worries, that’s where the Blue Magic comes in.

It may look like some kind of axle grease or joint compound, and in a pinch it is very helpful in getting small gaskets and O-rings in place. But it’s also the secret weapon in the slick-hair arsenal.It's Blue!
Simply step out of a hot shower, or use the hot rag trick, and then comb your hair into the closest approximation of the style you desire. Take a small amount of the Blue Magic, rub it into your palms, do the Fonzie Motion until you have a light and even coverage in your hair. Now style the finishing touches, and your hair might even look better than with Murray’s alone.

Continue reading ‘Day Two: Murray’s and Blue Magic…’

Pomp and Circumstance: Murray’s day one…

•June 13, 2008 • Leave a Comment

Because I’m bored, and because Back to the Fifties is next weekend, I figured I’d post a little how-to on having a great looking pompadour.  Also, I don’t anticipate having enough hair to pull one of these off within the next couple of years, so there’s no time like the present.

I use Murray’s Original Pomade, because it’s sold at Target, Wal-Mart, and pretty much anywhere else.  I can’t vouch for the Lucky 13/Murray’s product, and I ain’t payin no $8 for stuff for my hair.  Murray’s comes in two strengths, the good stufforiginal and Super-Light.  As in most other things, stick with the Original.

If your hair naturally grows in any direction other than straight back, start with either soaking wet hair, or straight from the shower and towel dried.  Comb it back from your forehead, and if need be you can use a hairdryer to dry it in place.  Don’t worry if it doesn’t look right, this is just the first step.  Otherwise, let your product-free hair dry in place.

Next, just like you would as if you were putting shoe polish on a rag, rub your fingers around the top of the Murray’s until you have a good-sized glob on your fingers.  Now insert it into your palm, and vigorously rub your hands together until you have it evenly spread onto both palms, and slightly melty feeling.

  • Note, Murrays is a waxy but petroleum based product, and heat will cause it to go from solid to liquid.  You can use friction or a blow dryer on the hot setting to cause it to melt.

Quickly run your freshly melted Murray’s across your hair in the direction you want your pomp to go.  This is an almost Fonzie like move,ehh! but it’s worth it.  Repeat the last two steps until your hair is coated on the outside.  Again, this will not necessarily resemble the finished product, but it’s a step in the right direction.  Your hair may clump, or look like it’s been coated in plastic, but that’s fine.

To “cure” your hair, take a rag and run it under hot water until it’s thoroughly soaked and almost too hot to stand.  Wring some of the water out, so it doesn’t constantly drip, and drape it over your hair.  You’ll want to make sure the top and sides of your head are covered, as the heat and steam from the towel will help the Murray’s become one with your follicles.  As you feel the rag start to cool, usually 30-50 seconds after you put it on, remove the rag and quickly come your hair back from your forehead.

It is at this point that you can style your pomp to your particular desire.  Some will want a pronounced peak at the front, which gradually sinks back to the scalp at the back of the head.  Others will go for a more boxy look, like Mutt Williams’ hair in Indiana Jones 4.Thank God! The Beef!If you don’t get it right the first time, fear not.  Simply repeat the hot rag trick, and you can always take another crack at it.  Once it’s good,  you can ride down the highway in a convertible doing 90 and your hair will stay mint.

Tomorrow, day two: Murrays and Blue Magic.

Bwee, but awesome…

•June 4, 2008 • 1 Comment

This post will start nerdy, and then proceed to intensify at an exponential rate.  This is my promise to you, dear reader.

awesomeness

Someone took the time to recreate some iconic photographs with Lego people.  Check out his photostream, as it’s quite amazing.  This is exactly the kind of thing I originally wanted to do for my 4-H project in 8th grade.  But we ended up shooting off model rockets instead.  I think I did a better job at rockets than I would have with the cheap automatic camera and limited amount of Lego’s.

Now on to nerdness-squared.  Following a link from one of the resources used by the Lego Photographer, I found these guys.  They make custom and aftermarket Lego weapons and people.  Seriously, check it out and tell you wouldn’t have mowed lawns all summer long just to get your 7th grade hands on some of these weapons packs.  I would, and I for damn sure wish I still had the time and toys to make it worth dropping $25 for a the complete set of guns.

Bweeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeesquared

birfday…

•May 30, 2008 • Leave a Comment

On Sunday I turn 27, woohoo.  I have reached the point where birthdays are now a yardstick used to measure my success in life, or lack thereof.  Thinking back, I can remember many dreams and goals I had set for myself that have yet to materialize.  And since I am part of the Gen X/Y border, complaining about getting older is kind of the thing to do.  Because I recognize this, or maybe just because I’m trying to be less bitchy, I’ll do the opposite with this post.

So what things have I dreamed of doing, or set as goals, that I have accomplished?

  1. Got married to a wonderful lady. check
  2. Bought and learned to play(passably) the String Bass
  3. Moved out of my parents
  4. Went back to school to get a degree
  5. Ate my weight in fritos- Not yet
  6. Seen most of my favorite bands in concert, at least the ones who aren’t dead.
  7. Full sleeve tattoos (2/3rds of the way there)
  8. Learned to shave with a straight razor
  9. Tasted Johnny Walker Green Label

That’s all I can think of for now, so I’ll just this one more thing:

emo sucks

Give ’em the boot…

•May 21, 2008 • Leave a Comment

I finally did it.  After more than a year playing Country/Western music, I purchased cowboy boots.bootsie collins?

I found them online for a very reasonable price, and decided that they were worth it, because I’m worth it.
Actually, I just wanted to make sure I got a good deal, and that my interest in western music wasn’t just a phase.

So now that I have the boots, I think I’ll probably get into my new musical interest: Fruit-referencing Electronica!

Just another mustache Monday…

•May 13, 2008 • Leave a Comment

Attempt number three, to grow a mustache, has been counted a failure.  First attempt, back in 1998, was counted a loss due to an appalling amount of source material.  I was lucky to be able to produce something beyond the most pitiful of chin-pubes.

Attempt the second, last year, came more as an ironic protest against the draconian facial hair rules at my work.  As I reached the zenith of disillusionment, I decided to strike back by not shaving.  Again,result for nekkid face.

This time, just boredom, really.  And after a day of wearing a semi-transparent soup strainer, I gave up again.  Partly, because I do resemble someone who would drive around wearing aviator sunglasses, asking kids if they want to see the kitties I have in the back of the van.  Also, the hot wife won’t kiss me if I have a ‘stache, so that kinda puts paid to that.  To keep this brief, but entertaining, appending this post is a list of the totality of humanity allowed to wear a mustache.  On anyone but these folks, it should be cause for a taser-and-nair posse.

The end.  Anyone else, up to and including my father-in-law, just looks either untrustworthy or all-out evil in a mustache.  Examples?  Hitler, Stalin, Snidely Whiplash, John Oates, even Sean Connery.

iWant…

•May 12, 2008 • Leave a Comment

In case anyone is wondering what to get me for my Birthday(hint, hint) here you go.

awesomness

Buy it here, along with all your other hair products.